Aging is an extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been.
-David Bowie
I turn 40 today.
I’ve been in this body for 40 years and really I don’t have much to say about it. I feel the same as I felt yesterday and really not much different than I felt a year ago and beyond. I’ve loved it and hated it, inside and out. I have had so many incredibly joyous moments in my life as well as the difficult and heart-crushingly painful but, ultimately, I am happy.
Content.
At total peace with who I am and continue to be as a human.
And that is everything.
I don’t really understand the inherent way we are programmed to sort of brace for entering into a new decade of age but I do feel it every time.
Oh, dirty 30, aayyyyy, that’s a big one, amiright?!
40 this year?! Are you going to have a party? That’s one to celebrate!!
The big 5-0?! Who’d have ever thought, huh!?
I remember it at 30, or on the eve of it or whatever. Is this going to really feel different? It didn’t. And now, thinking back, around 38 I started realizing I could now see the pinhole light of 40 approaching. What’s that going to feel like? Is it going to feel different? Is that old? I sure don’t feel old. I think I feel more authentically myself and alive than ever before actually..